No one does it better.
You'll see that in this Sun story which skewers PM Gordon Brown and his government before The Sun ends its story reporting - no doubt with wry satisfaction - its concern for the security of Brown and his top aides.
GORDON Brown was red-faced again last night after his MAKE-UP tips were left in a taxi by a bungling aide.
The note, among a pile of sensitive documents, told the craggy-faced PM how to apply layers of slap and fake tan.
It adds to his embarrassment after the MPs’ expenses row. It came as details of Tory expenses emerged. There are also security concerns.
The file contained details of Mr Brown’s trip to Yorkshire last week.
A white A4 sheet listed Mr Brown’s make-up routine if he has to do it himself. It read:
1. Transparent Brush. Foam all over. This is believed to be an illuminating foam to give the PM’s face that certain glow.
2. Small pot under eyes, dimple, creases, blend in. This refers to the use of concealer to smooth out facial bumps and blemishes.
3. Clinique. Super balanced make-up. All over again, like painting a wall, and ears. Shut eyes over lids then with make-up pad smooth over liquid. This tells the PM to trowel foundation over his whole face.
4. Powder (dark brush) terracotta Guerlain, all over. Slap on fake tan bronzer.
A Westminster insider said: “It’s an idiot’s guide to applying heavy make-up. It will cause deep embarrassment because the PM paints himself as a no-nonsense man’s man.”
Mr Brown, 58, whose claims for a cleaner were revealed last week, has never put cosmetics on expenses.
But No10 officials will be more concerned by other papers in the aide’s rucksack, left in a London black cab after the ministerial party arrived at Kings Cross from Yorkshire on Friday.
It contained discussions on how to handle the expenses scandal — and a schedule for Mr Brown’s trip, marked Confidential.
Times of departure, the cars the PM and Home Secretary Jacqui Smith were in and their train times were detailed. It could have been put to deadly use if it fell into the hands of terrorists before the journey.
The cabbie handed it to The Sun. We returned it to Downing Street last night.
A No10 spokesman said: “The bag was accidentally left by a junior member of staff. We thank The Sun for returning it. The PM, like everyone on TV, is required to wear make-up.”